27 July 2005

Not My Fault

No, really, it’s not. It’s always somebody else’s fault. In this instance, the somebody else is the Hillsborough County Aviation Authority. Why is somebody suing the agency that oversees all county airports? Could it be jet noise? Fumes? An aircraft accident?

Nah. He got drunk.

He got drunk, and belligerent, and airport police officers escorted him away from the airplane he was trying to board at Tampa International. But he fell down an escalator—and since he was being escorted at the time, it is obviously the escorts’ fault, and thus their employer’s fault, that he got hurt. Not his fault. He was only drinking. He did nothing wrong, although he was too drunk and disorderly to board a Delta Airlines jet and at this point they’ll take just about anybody.

He’s asking for at least 15 grand. It happened four months ago; he filed the lawsuit just Monday morning, but apparently was feeling well enough at the time to go on a cruise, where he is right now.

This man’s attorney, Amy G. Cohen, is an example of a bad lawyer. If I ever become a bad lawyer, somebody please kidnap me and beat me up.

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