Headsongs

One of the things I like about the old church hymns I sang growing up are that every now and then one filters out of the airwaves and lodges in my brain, and unlike most of the catchy pop garbage on the radio, the hymns are actually nice to have rattling around up there for a while. They're pretty music. I generally know all the lyrics, or at least one whole verse, which means the song doesn't stay stuck for long. Compare this against something like, say, Tom's Diner, where you know only the first eight or ten words but they repeat ad infinitum and you can't get rid of them.

The last couple days I've had a very nice old hymn rattling around in my head, which has been pleasant. I don't recall the name but I had the entire opening stanza; the words and tune to this hymn have just in the last hour or so completely vacated my mind, crawled off into whatever dark corner old song lyrics occupy in my brain and flitting out into the airwaves to catch some other unsuspecting person off guard. I don't know what tune will take its place, but I hope it's a good one.

It was quite a nice thing to have in my head there for a few days, given what it replaced. What it replaced was a hilarious little ditty from an episode of Futurama that, while funny, grew extremely irritating after three or four days. Those who know the tune can sing along with Fry, Leela, Bender, Robot Santa, and the happy Neptunian elves:

We are free and fairly sober,
with so many toys to build;
the machines are kind of tricky
prob'ly someone will be killed.
But we gladly work for nothing…
Which is good because
we don't intend to pay…

The elves are back to work today!
Hooray!

We have just a couple hours
to make several billion gifts;
and the labor isn't easy.
And you'll all work triple shifts.
You can make the job go quicker
if you turn up the controls to super speed…

It's back to work on X-mas Eve.
Hooray?!

And though you're cold and sore and ugly,
your pride will mask the pain!
Let my happy smile warm your hearts.
There's a toy lodged in my brain!

We are getting awf'ly tired,
and we can't work any faster,
and we're very very sorry.
Why you selfish little bastards!
Do you want the kids to think
that Santa's just a crummy
empty-handed jerk?

(No! Sorry!)
Then shut your yaps and back to work!

Now it's very nearly X-mas,
And we've done the best we could.
These toy soldiers are poorly painted,
And they're made from inferior wood.
I should give you all a beating
but I really have to fly.
If I weren't stuck here frozen
I'd harpoon you in the eye!
Now it's back into our tenements
to drown ourselves in rye.
You did the best you could, I guess,
and some of these gorillas are okay.

Hooray! We're adequate!

The elves have rescued X-mas day!
Hooray!