09 February 2005

The DMV

The time has come to renew my Florida drivers license. I can do this one of four ways.

The most popular has long been the renew-by-mail method, which used to be one of just two options. The other, of course, was to actually go down to the DMV and wait in line and fill out the paperwork and get an entirely new license. Nobody ever did that, not really, because the lines at the DMV are, of course, the stuff of legend. Wait, wait, wait some more, that has always been the motto of DMVs in every state.

Well, Florida decided recently to move into the 21st Century, and began offering two additional ways to renew, for those people who feel the U.S. mail is too slow and that 37 cents or whatever it is these days is too much for a stamp. Hooray for progress.

Now, in addition to renewing in person (which nobody does) and renewing by mail (which only people over 55 would actually do), you can also renew by phone. But think about this. Renew your drivers’ license by phone?

Come on. Phone calls to large impersonal organizations like banks, insurance companies, and computer technical support operations are painful at best, an exercise in self-flagellation and futility. And now you’re telling me I should add to that the fact that this is still the DMV, the people who get a perverse pleasure out of making you wait in a line only to tell you you’ve been waiting in the wrong line? Get real.

I can’t imagine who is actually doing this. For my part, I am one of the perhaps two dozen Americans still using a rotary-dial telephone exclusively (I have the cell, of course, but what sort of person decides to use waste phone minutes on hold instead of spending 37 cents on a stamp? Okay, okay, everybody under the age of 30, but still, it’s absurd), so there’s almost no chance in hell that I’d actually manage to get through the system anyway.

That leaves the holy grail of renewal options, renewing online. This seems obvious. You simply visit www.gorenew.com and you can click your way to five more years of driving on a license with that ridiculous picture of you when you were 21 and actually went to the DMV solely to get an ID that didn’t have “Under 21” stamped across the front. I figured I’d go ahead and do this.

Wait wait, here’s the punchline.

I went to the site. You can go there yourself. You choose the option you want, and click continue. And then you wait.

And you wait. And you wait some more. And then you get the following message, after about ten minutes or so:

The connection to express.hsmv.state.fl.us has terminated unexpectedly. Some data may have been transferred.

Yes, that’s it. So much for renewing online. If they can’t make you wait one way, I guess they’ll find another. Now where did I put my stamps?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i just left the website to renew your license and it only took three minutes, some where out there is a state worker cringeing knowing that i got through so fast.HUUUMMMM HAAAAAAAHAA HAAAAAAA I once waited in line at the dmv to renew my license and i actually had the best of intensions to return to work when i was through. I reached there at 8 and low and behold there were people who looked as if they had been camping out from the night before as if to get front row for the game. Fast forward ahead at lunch time, o yes they have to take there lunch . I am now # 19 in line. Now if there was ever a place to watch your life whither away with the other lemmings in society this was the place. To watch frustration build on many faces when they reach the teller to be told ,"well i'm sorry but u need more documentation". If you were psycic i'm sure u might hear their brain snap. i'm always surprise there are no incidents of violence at the dmv. Anyway i finanny renewed my license about 1:30. That experience was one that i know a few people have had, so let us all give a hand to the state of florida for stepping into cyberspace with online renewal. For those who still need to have an excuse as to why they could not make it to work , the old "i was at the dmv" line might soon be a thing of the past so use it now whilst you can.